A Report On What YOU Eat

Yo peeps.
Here is a neeewww POST!!! Voila!

The Thoughts Behind The Grill- The People Flipping the Burgers

Have you ever wondered what fast food workers are thinking? Here's your chance to find out.

I gave a sad, sorry sigh and handed the impatient, pudgy man a greaseburger. I am one of the poor, wretched people who work at fast food joints around the world, and exist with only the hope that one day the customers will pick up on my depressed mood and quit coming here.

Looking up at the clock, I rolled my eyes. It was time for the Shift of Doom: cooking the greaseburgers. I marched into the grilling room, mock-goose marching for my own entertainment. Bored as heck, I dumped five greaseburgers on the grill, poking them with a spatula and considering spitting on them. As proof of my angelicalness, I didn't.

Five minutes later a strange smell wafted past my nose. Gagging, I turned from my observation of the floor back to the grill. The greaseburgers were charred beyond recognition. I exhaled sharply, utterly and totally exasperated as, to add to that problem, a strange feeling fell over me. I recognized it quickly; I was immensly, enormously hungery. As if controled by some great, supernatural force, I felt my hand reaching out to the greaseburgers, pulled by hunger.

It all happened so fast I barely even knew what happened. Seconds later, all five greaseburgers were in my stomach. Or at least, I thought they were. One small chunk was caught in my throat. An awful retching sound came out of me. I was being choked to death by a greaseburger!

I only hoped when management came in in the morning they felt bad about what they had caused... Or else...

Written by Hobo on the Street with the help of Automatic Delivery Subsystem

A FIRE TRUCK STORY

BOB THE HOBO RECENTLY FOUND A PURPLE FIRE SPARKLY FIRE TRUCK ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD THAT HAD A SIGN ON IT THAT SAID, " IF YOUR NAME IS BOB THIS FIRETRUCK IS YOURS," IT ALSO HAD A KEY ON IT. BOB GLADLY PICKED UP THE KEY AND DROVE TO A BURGER KING IN MONTANA WHERE HE GOT A JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THEN THE OWNER OF BURGER KING FOUND OUT ( HE WAS THE ONE THAT REJECTED BOB SO MANY TIMES BECAUSE HE WAS A DIRTY , NOT SMART, AND ANNOYING HOBO) AND KICKED BOB AND HIS FIRETRUCK ALL THE WAY BACK TO HIS LARGE HOUSE OF CARDBOARD BOXES ON THE BORDER OF A SMALL TOWN CALLED DRYDEN. BUT HE STILL HAS HIS FIRE TRUCK AND WITH THAT HE DRIVES TO RECYCLING PLACES ALL OVER AMERICA TO BEG FOR CARDBOARD BOXES WITH WHICH ADDS TO HIS HOUSE ( HE NEEDS A LOT OF CARDBOARD BECAUSE IT GET SOGGY AND FALLS DOWN A LOT). PURPLE SPARKLY FIRE TRUCKS ROCK !!!!!!!!!!!!!

bob: another story

Bob the hobo suffers from many diseases........ mild OCD, MPD, schizophrenia, delusions, anger issues ( not a disease), and sometimes he will become very depressed. When Bob gets depressed he will completely shut out the whole world. This may lead to him walking into some random persons house. He snaps out of his zone out only when the owner of that house starts hitting him with a baseball bat. We need to keep him away from our homes and our children, but at the same time we need to help him. The help bob the hobo association is what we need to join to do that. That is the H.B.T.H.A. Bobs dad is in jail and his mom is dead. Bob wants a job at burger king or a highly important law firm but so far he has not been able to get a job anywhere, HE HATES MCDONALD'S!!!!!!!!!! This is because his wife left him after a fight over which one is better, McDonald's or BURGER KING. Bob has had many pets ( all rocks ), but they died so bob gave up.

bob's mom: another story

Bob's mother was a beautiful woman but she died when bob was very young. She was smart, funny, and as i already mentioned beautiful. She died from an illness but we dont know what that illness is. :(

bob's dad: another story

Bobs dad was arrested for blowing up an empty school, stealing a camel, and eating a police officers tootsie roll. He also suffers from many of bob's diseases. His name and age are unknown.

Backhistory- Street's Version 1

Bob the Hobo was born to a very nice, pretty young woman. Unfortunately, she died soon after Bob's birth, so he never knew her very well. His father was a very well educated man, but with slightly misguided ideas. For instance, he was put in jail for blowing up an (empty) shool to save innocent children from the horrors of conformity.
Maybe his bad parenting example is why Bob has never had kids or a love life. His wife left him after a spat over which was better, McDonalds or Burger King. Bob stubbornly maintains that Burger King is better, which is good because that is the only place he can get a job nowadays.
Bob the hobo has also had several ailments since birth, including schizophrenia, mild OCD, MPD, and delusions. The OCD bit is particularly unfair because he can't get very clean living on the streets. Many people are working to get Bob a psychiatryst. You can help the cause by donating to the Save The World From Terror And Get Bob The Hobo A Psychiatrist people when they call to get donations.

The Begining

Greetings, Earthlings.
We have created this blog to share the story of Bob the hobo's life with you. We don't exactly have a definite schedule for updates, but we will not abandon this! (We think.) Please don't be rude about our documentary skizzles. It would hurt our feelings.
Until the next post,
Hobo on the Street and the amazing Automatic Delivery Subsystem